Birthday Business and Whatnot.

Thanks to my hunny bunny, my daughter and a few close friends I had a nice quiet birthday. Alright, it was quiet on Friday night on my actual birthday but not so quiet on Saturday when we went out for dinner and games. I got to play laser tag for the first time in about 16 years. It was a hoot. I did discover that should I be in a war, due to how out of shape I am in, I would be pretty dead, pretty fast. I foresee that yoga helping me on my way to being a well-fit solider type who can obiliterate all those in her path. Uhh huh.
Goals people, we must have goals. Currently, mine is to laser tag the shit out of people.

I am ready for change

Change scares me sometimes. I suppose it's because I have had way too many changes in my life as it is and they weren't always good ones. In fact, the first few were awful. That being said, I am ready for it. I know it can be hard but the changes I want to make are for bettering myself and my situation. Things can only look up from here. I sort of keep expecting that something terrible will happen; I think that always sits on the edge of my consciousness and gnaws away slowly at my ability to be truly at peace and happy with my life RIGHT NOW, at this time. I seem to be awaiting some sort of doom and quite frankly, it's pissing me off. I'm working on that.

Patience is a virtue and I have a couple of grains of salt out of a full shaker at the moment. I want things to happen RIGHT NOW. I am afraid that if they do not, I will never see them done. I need to remember that 'Good things come to those who wait'. In the past that wasn't so with me, I had given up on that notion completely. It hasn't gotten me to where I want to be so I need to change this. End of story.

How does one gain patience? Maybe I will try yoga.

I have decided to start writing under a pseudonym. I'm not going to divulge the subject on which I wish to write about nor do I plan on making it known what my pen name is. I find creative writing to be a nice release. I enjoy storytelling and I have a lot going on in my head thanks to an over-active imagination. It's time to let some of it out of my head so I can think of new ones. Sometimes people just need to share. heh.

It's my 31st birthday today. Yay me. I am getting bored of birthdays, can we make them stop please? It means I get older, you see, and I am not liking some of the things that are happening as a result of these continuing birthdays. I'm cool with not getting gifts or a cake. I'll trade that for no wrinkles, hair that I didn't know existed, hair that I know exists but I hide it cleverly with dye...these sort of things. Gravity is taking quite a toll as well. I suspect gravity thinks it is all fun and games. I am NOT playing ok? Shit. On that note, I am supposed to be getting a Wii fit plus for my birthday. I plan on starting the aforementioned yoga using this. There is one slight problem. They are selling out like hookers on welfare cheque day. It's a bit nutty and I'd just like ONE please. It should not be this hard to find one of these damn things. Gravity has won for a few days longer but I'm going to be on the damn phones in the morning, annoying the shit out of the clerks at the stores around here until I find one. Oh wait, I sound impatient again. SHIT. See, I really have to work on this! :)

You can pick your nose..but you can't pick your family.

Planning a wedding is more work that I thought it would be, that's for sure. The stress of finding people at the last minute has taken a toll on my I think. Due tro the fact that we decided to get married this year, a lot of stuff was booked up already when I started looking at venues and decorators, that sorta stuff. I really shouold not complain however. I have lucked out hardcore with finding a decorator who is reeeeeeeally nice, a cake lady who is just as nice and super talented and of course, my dress at such an awesome price. Oh, not to mention that the bridesmaids all decided on a dress and it was the second one they tried on and they get a 10% discount because I bought my dress at the same place. I have money making schemes to be able to afford the wedding such as having a big yard sale, a stag and doe, and I spoke with Mr. Berries today and I may have a summer job working the berry stand here in Almonte. He liked the idea very much because he knows he can trust me completely, being that I have known them for gosh, 18 years? Shit. I am old.. lol

I am feeling a little sorry for myself and I know that I am. It would seem as though my family is just not excited about me getting married at all. I never get any emails of calls asking how it's going etc.. I sent my aunt an email yesterday right after she sent me one returning my earlier email about mother's day. In it I was telling her all about the wedding planning and I sent her a link to our prospective photographer and asked for her opinion. She hasn't replied at all. She even sent me a forward later that day about some silly chain letter, but no word about wedding stuff. When I told my dad, he just seemed to not care either. My family on my mom's side is all about conditional love. I have never felt good enough around them..namely my aunt. My uncle is very hard to get along with so we don't talk much. They are both my godparents. My mom's sister and her brother. I think my mom picked very poorly. My aunt is always giving me these self-help books for xmas and birthdays and shit like that. As if I am not good enough on my own but I need improvements. She's always been like that with me. I just wish they would accept me for ME and not for who I am or what i could ahve been.

BLARGH.
FAM DAMNLY.

Poop on a stick and shit and piss and ..

I'm sorry,...tourettes...

I feel like crying.

Oh umm... I have lots to say.

It's been quite a while again since my last post so this one might be full of stuff...n things...
n more stuff.

I moved to Almonte Ontario and it's about a 40 min drive to downtown Ottawa from here. Of course this depends on how fast you drive. That's about average. The Bean and I moved in with The Fiancee and of course my cats came with us. The cats are absolutely loving all of the space here and so are we! We still have quite a bit of rearranging and unpacking and storing to do but hey, it's still awesome. We got a new stove today from our landlord because the old one was a piece of crap.

The Bean started school last Tuesday and she is loving her new school. She has made quite a few friends already and is not finding the new curriculum hard at all. It's better out here for her French immersion program. Instead of having it full days french like in Ottawa, they split the day and subjects taught in each language in half. When I went from French to English it really screwed with my spelling and stuff. I also really like her teachers. They are really friendly and helpful. The only thing that is lacking is the bus service. They haven't called me back as to why her bus isn't scheduled to pick her up yet. I tried calling on Friday and left a message and then today someone at the school was supposed to find out what was up with the bus but they didn't call back either. This sucks because I had to keep The Bean home today because I couldn't walk to pick her up from school. I HAVE STREP THROAT AGAIN!! Whaaaaa.

Why oh why? I just want to be able to be healthy enough to finish unpacking and sorting around here. The week before I moved, Karma really kicked my ass. It decided that because I hadn't packed what I should be packing all month, that it would give me the nastiest sinus cold I have ever had. I never used to get sinus colds. I think I'd like to reverse in age now. I am not liking getting older much right about now.. :P

Oh...there goes the train. Yeah, that's the train that's about umm, less than 50 yards from my backyard. It's loud but you totally get used to it. When we first stayed here it woke me up every morning but now I sleep right through the frigger. He loves to blow his horn 20 times while passing through town. I know, it's mandatory but I am sure the bastard gets a good laugh blowing his horn at 6am every morning. I know I would. heh

There has been a little bit of "nature" happening in our house. Seems that we have a very old house and along with the old house comes an old basement that is kinda scary. When we first moved in, the cats were let out down there so they would be out of the way for the movers and they got covered in cobwebs and continued to do so as they explored the vast cavernous dungeon, er basement for a few days. This did not bother me. Ever seen a house centipede? Yeah, I am sure you have but have you ever seen a house centipede on steroids?
I did. In fact, I have seen three of them. I have also made The Fiancee deal with the three of them too. Seems like we are going to be doing some caulking. You can never have too much caulk...uhhuh.
The Fiancee and I retired to bed the other night and we were almost asleep when I heard a weird raucous going on in the hallway. It was the cats playing with..something. I was like "shut up cats!" and then I tried to go back to sleep only I heard this weird flappy noise and it was now in our room. I was poking The Fiancee and telling him something weird was going on but he didn't seem to take me seriously or something because he continued to lie there for a bit longer. I figured out what the noise was. It was a bat. BAT. yeah... I think the little frigger got into the basement and well FattyFats (my male cat) decided it was a good toy. He doesn't like to kill little animals he just likes to play with them and then leave them for me or someone else to deal with. Thanks Fatty Fats. Needless to say, The Fiancee chased the damn thing and eventually caught it in a fishing net and put his leather gloves on to throw it out the door. LOL

The Ottawa Wedding Show was this past weekend. I went with my new neighbour, my maid of honour and one of my bridesmaids, Maven. The first thing we did after walking through the front and filling out some info was got look at dresses and I tried a bunch on. I feel in love with the second dress I tried on and I bought the thing right there and then! It's exactly the style I was hoping would look good on me. I thought about another style and tried on a dress like it but it was NOT happening. I looked like a frou-frou princess in a nightgown of sorts. The thing that sold me on the dress was also the price. It was weetawdedly cheap! It's an Alfred Sung too so it's not a cheaply made piece of crap either. I am SOOO happy and relieved! That's one less stressor gone. Woot!